Self-Acceptance Series
from:http://www.immanuels.org/biblical_counseling/

Self Hatred

God's View:
John 14:21-23 -Through Jesus Christ our human spirit is in union with theSpirit of God. Jesus is the mediator between God and man. He reveals the Father, unites us with the Father, and comes with Father to make His home with us. Jesus' life radiates throughout our soul-that is, our memories, feelings, willings, the intuitive and imaginative faculties, even to our sensory and physical being. His Light encounters the dark places of unforgiveness and woundedness within us, healing then can take place.

Hope:
Rom. 8:1-2 -Our true center is Christ, and we are to operate from the law of of the Spirit of Life, no longer living our lives from a guilt and shame ridden past in which we hated or were hated by others resulting in self pity, sense of inferiority, failure to accept self or others. We are to acknowledge this self full of hatred and begin to deal with it God's way. Confess and repent before Christ, this opens the heart to receive healing from the One Who redeems.

2Cor. 5:17 , 21 -Self hatred is usually hidden deep in the heart through repeated acts of being violated, and our subjective focus on our own means to deal with the evil without reference to God. This is idolatry, trying to deal with sins through one's own feelings. But Christ took your sin on the cross, give it to Him, . Now be free, in Christ you were made good with the goodness of God. Your self acceptance must be grounded in the awareness that God accepts you in Christ. Thus keep your eye focused on the Source of your salvation, not on your 'diseased'habitual attitudes formed over the years.

Rom. 8:12-13 -No need to live from the lower self, obeying its drives but by an act of your will acknowledge your need for emotional healing. Deal simply with inner insecurities and self hatred and gain a secure identity in Christ. You are justified in Jesus, learn to Practice the Presence of Christ. Choosing to think this way, healing follows.

Change:

Matt. 16:24-26 ; Gal. 5:18 ; Rom. 6:6 -We must differentiate between the self that works with the principle of evil and selfishness, and the self that abides in Christ and colloborates with Him. That is the true self, the justified new creation, that soul that is saved and lives eternally.

Isa. 61:10 ; Gal. 5:18 -Only with the full acceptance of this new self can we find our true center, the place of quiet strength and solid being, that center from which we know and see ourselves to be white-robed in the very righteousness of Christ Himself.

Matt. 5:23-24 ; 6:14-15 -Failure to forgive others and or to receive forgiveness for ourselves are great blocks of wholeness in Christ. This results in a judgmental spirit that is harsh and demanding on self and others, a strong perfectionist attitude demanding the impossible from self and others, a fear of future events, a sense of aloneness and abandonment in times of decision, and a preoccupation with one's own guilt, and a compulsion to compete for position and success. By forgiving and being and acting forgiven, these diseased attitudinal patterns will gradually heal.

Prayers for Restoring the Soul

·Prayer of Thanksgiving

Holy Father, I thank You that I am reconciled to You through the death of Your Son, and that through faith in Him as my Saviour from sin, my heart is not only washed clean from my own sin, but it can be delivered from its grievous reactions to the sins and shortcomings of others around and against it. Because of Your Son, Father, I can look straight up to You and dare to let all these feelings surface, and I do so now, knowing that Christ is ready to take them and give me in exchange His Life and Your perspective on myself and others. Accept my thanksgiving, O God our Father. I thank You for Christ who has redeemed me from sin and death and who is even now pouring His eternal life into me.

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of the Father, in whom I am to abide, to fully live, move and have my being(my true and new self), I direct my thanksgiving to You. I bow before You as Lord of my life, and I thank

You, Precious Holy One, crucified for me, that Your blood justifies me, that in oneness with You, Your goodness is mine.

Holy Spirit, Thou who dost so constantly and faithfully mediate to us the love of both Father and Son, I thank You now for the grace to receive all that is mine as a child of God. Empower me now as I renounce the sin of self-hatred and as I move toward the goal of wholly accepting my true identity as a child of God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

·Prayer of Petition

Well you know, O Lord, that I have been unable to appropriate Your holiness and righteousness as I wish; I have been unable to practice Your Presence because my feelings about myself are so diseased. I have

looked to You, just now, as my dying Saviour, taking into Yourself my sin and darkness, my diseased feelings about You, others, myself. I thank You that you have done this and that in time even my feeling self will reflect this. Heretofore, Lord, I have taken my eyes from You and from the objective truth and have descended into and lived out of my unhealed feeling self. This, with Your help, Lord, I will cease doing, and I will note the very moment I am 'living out of 'that subjective, hurting place and will look straight up to You for the healing word You are always sending. I confess to You the sin of pride that is bound up in my self-hatred. I thank You for Your forgiveness and for the full release from it.

Prayer of Renunciation
Now, Lord, in Your Name and with the grace You shower upon me, I renounce the sin of self-hatred.

Self-Acceptance

God's View:
Rom. 7:18 ; 8:12-13 ; Lu. 9:23-24 -Nothing good lives in our sinful nature. We are not to look to our past, to change or heal, or to reform past memories through self-realization or self-actualization. We are to put the diseased memories to death with Christ on the Cross. Look to Christ, forgive others or be forgiven, then we find healing for past memories.

We are not called to self-realization but to identification with Christ. Our true self at any stage of becoming is in Christ. All the wounds we suffered in the past, accept as a reality and see Jesus take these wounds on the cross. There He took upon and into Himself our darkness and depression and gives us in exchange His light and life.

Hope:
Eph. 4:17-24 ; 3:16-19 -Failing to love ourselves aright, we will love ourselves amiss. Concern over our sins 'inferiority' or shortcomings are examples of the wrong form of self-love. Our reactions to the past must be identified, recognized and come to terms with. Our grievous and subjective reactions to the shortcomings and sins of others against us, must be accepted and not denied, and forgiveness extended. Once these are identified, we take them to God the Father and with Him we deal with the situation. His truths begin to flow into our being and our souls and we become that which God says we are in His Son.

2 Cor. 13:5 ; 3:16-18 ; Gal. 4:19 ; Lu. 10:19 -You have the nature of God, and the great and mighty Holy Spirit, and you are the son of God. You have the authority that is in heaven, all you have to do is to go and practice it, the practice of who and what you are in Christ Jesus, not what you were or have done or what was done to you in the past.

2Cor. 5:21 ; James 4:10 -We cannot become good enough on our own, we can't heal ourselves by our reasons or feelings or self-effort. We must live from a new center, Jesus Christ. It is He Who will lead and direct us and make our lives significant.

Change:

Isa. 55:1-3 ; 61:1 -Self-hatred in the christian is a substitute for humility, It belongs to pride. We are to repent of this focus on self, go to the Lord, listen to His words and grow into His image. We bring dysfunctional, sinful, prideful patterns in the thought life and imagination into submission to Christ. In listening prayer, every thought of the mind, every imagination of the heart, is brought captive to Christ.

Gal. 5:16-18 -To walk in the Spirit is to live in the present moment, always looking to Christ, always practicing His Presence, always moving in tandem with him.

Ps. 51 -No matter how deep the wounding and horrendous the sin, the acknowledgement of ourselves as sinful from birth, the reception of Christ's forgiveness, and the extending of this forgiveness to others releases us from self-hatred and shame. We are to train our minds to think, to think through all the issues of our lives with God. Then, as we learn to hear God, we will receive from Him the true word, and we replace our old diseased negatives with the positive word He is always sending.

Healing of Memories: Forgiveness of Sin

God's View:
Gal. 2:20 ; 2 Cor. 3:16-18 -At the moment of the new birth, God's Spirit descends into the human spirit, a place where the Holy Spirit lives and from which He radiates up through the soul as well as the physical body. Thusly, believers are to Practice His Presence within which opens up channels for healing of man's soul and the basis for further becoming in Christ. The Spirit is the inner depth of man's being, the higher aspect of his personality. The soul expresses man's own special and distinctive individuality. The spirit is man's nonmaterial matter looking Godward; the soul is that same nature of man looking earthward and touching things of sense.

Hope:
Ps. 32:5 ; Lu. 11:2-4 ; Isa. 61:1-4 -When we forgive others and receive God's forgiveness for our sins, God's Spirit can now radiate through this barrier of unforgiveness and proceed to heal our soul. Forgiveness of sin impacts the soul in its totality-emotional, feeling, intuitive, imaginative faculties. God's healing Presence wonderfully heals man's deepest hurts and memories.

Rom. 8:11 ; l Cor. 2:9-11 -Jesus is the living fountain rising up into the wells of our personality. Dwelling upon His Presence begins the process of healings :of guilt, experiences, of rejection, diseased or unnatural feelings, of desires and thoughts that are repressed--all the shameful past. The Holy Spirit is God's finger on sore memories. Each incident that comes to light, we are to forgive, and then we will receive from God illumination and healing, and the subsequent steps we are to take to maintain healing.

Col. 2:5 ; 1 Cor. 5:3-5 -Time and space are creatures, they are created. Jesus , the infinite One, is outside of time and space. All times are present to Him where nothing has yet passed away and nothing is still to come. All our times, together with all that we are, are eternally present to God. . Thus, through prayer we overcome the obstacles of time and space. God, eternally present, He is present to all our times-past, present and future. As we learn to collaborate with Him in prayer, He will heal all. Time does not erase our sins. Only by our repentance and His blood is sin and guilt lifted from past and present.

Change:

Matt. 6:14-15 ; 18:7 ; John 16:33 -Failure to forgive another is a most formidable barrier to wholeness. Always, at the bottom of everything that is amiss, we will find pride which needs to be confessed. Our failure to forgive the merely petty things of life, the everyday irritations and transgressions that gets to us leads us easily to despise those who offend us in these ways.

l Pet. 3:8-11 ; 2 Cor. 5:15-17 -We are to see others as Christ sees them. Ask the Lord to enable you to see the other person through His eyes. We will see the other's strengths and be reminded of our own weaknesses, and Christ's patience with the petty within ourselves. When tempted to react, see your irritation, anger, resentment come up and flow unto Christ on the Cross Who, in our stead, takes and carries all our sin and darkness. Then ask Christ to fill all these spaces where this pain, anger, resentment have been with His healing love and light. To do the contrary, to hate another is to eventually hate yourself.

l Pet. 2:23 ; Rom. 6:3-6 ; Dan. 9:4-19 ; Neh. 1:5-11 ; Matt. 18:18 -Being grievously wounded by someone, we are inclined to react in kind and place ourselves in gross sin as well. We must confess these sins before God that have deeply pierced the soul. With the confession , we extend forgiveness to the sinning one, then the power of that sin to continue to wound and to shape the sufferer is broken. We do not forgive evil, Satan, demons and evil principalities, but we forgive"persons" in the clutches of that evil.

Bind, Loose, Cast-out

God's View:
Col. 1:12-14 ; Rom. 12:1-2 ; Deut. 30:19 -We have been translated from the kingdom of darkness into the Kingdom of Light. God redeemed us, forgiven us, Satan no longer has any authority over our lives. We are under God's authority as long as we walk in the Light as He is in the Light. God put us into His Kingdom, now it is up to us to keep ourselves there. We determine whether we are blessed or cursed while on this earth. Our problem is not with Satan, Jesus dealt with him on the cross 2000 years ago. Our problem and resolution of same is in our relationship with God. Obeying God's commands we are blessed, to do the contrary is to subject ourselves to the curse.

Col. 2:13-15 ; Gal. 4:4-5 -When Christ died , we died with Him, when He arose from the dead, we rose with Him. Thus, we never have to die for our sins. Christ has already paid the penalty for our sins. He bore the shame, the guilt, the judgment, the condemnation, and the punishment for our sins, Being freed by His redemption, we are adopted as sons, heirs of God, joint-heirs with Jesus. Jesus made us kings and priests. Satan has been stripped of his power over our lives, we belong to God now and forever.

Isa. 53:4 ; 11:2-4; Matt. 9:6 ; 2 Cor. 5:17-21 -Jesus took upon Himself all sins we committed, and the sins committed against us, we are freed from bondages and yokes. This fact is to be realized in the depths of our being through counselors, study of God's word, meditation: channels of His healing. His forgiving word, His Presence within us in time becomes real in our inner man. Through these means, we bind and loose ourselves from sin as we appropriate what God has done for us, in us and as us.

Rom. 6:4-7 -In baptism, we are 'buried with Him' and are 'raised to life with Him'. Visualize this imagery of baptism, see the releasing of your soul from sin, and call forth the new self in the Risen Christ. The healing of the soul is never separated from this central doctrine of the forgiveness of sin. This is the area where we are mostly held in bondage and enslaved. Daily, visualize the imagery of baptism, see self free and loosed from slavery, and catapulted into the realm and reign of righteousness, clothed by Jesus Himself.

Matt. 16:13 ; Heb. 4:12 ; Rom. 5:17 -God's word revealed to your spirit sets in motion the forces and power of deliverance, of healing of the spirit, mind, emotions and the will. Clothed in His garments of Righteousness, we rule and reign through righteousness on this earth, we can't lose for winning.

Change:

Matt. 6:14 ; John 20:21-23 ; Matt. 18:18 -We do not 'bind' or 'loose' demons, principalities and powers, etc. In Christ's Name , we command them to leave, knowing that Christ's death and resurrection has already bound them. However, as sin is unremitted in a life, the demons and other dark forces have power in that life. Therefore, it is the sins and the effects of these sins we are to bind and loose, and it is by confession and repentance that one binds the sins, and looses himself from its control and power.

Gen. 4:6-7 ; Gal. 5:16-23 ; l Jn. 1:9 -Sin is an entity and ready to pounce on you when you fail to name and renounce your sin. Demons have authority in your life when you give them access by sinning. It is sin that is to be bound and the person loosed from it, not the casting out of demons. However, long standing sin patterns leave wounds in the soul, this needs healing, takes time in applying God's word to one's life. Demons may reside in these wounds. These are easily expelled once they are discerned by God's leading.

Eph. 6:10-18 ; Mark 16:15-18 ; Matt. 12:36-37 ; Neh. 6:3-4 -Do not focus on Satan, demons or principalities or powers. Do not practice praying against Satan rather than to God. You choose the battleground, not Satan. Jesus already bound satan at the cross. Thus, our emphasis is to be on God, to sing and to speak to God, to worship, give thanksgiving and praise. Always be found practicing the Presence of God, and not Satan. While doing this, as demons, principalities and powers are discerned directly in our path, we speak directly to them and command them to leave. Our emphasis is to be on the cross. We are set free by what Jesus done. It is finished. We are not to waste time talking to Satan or his hordes. We are in a battle already won. Be led by the Holy Spirit when confronting the enemy is required. The Holy Spirit will lead you to bind or loose or to cast out as appropriate.

Note: Long-standing sin patterns cause diseased attitudes and consequent aberrant and perverse behaviour. These wounds through God's word take time to heal, and in consequence, perverse behaviour will still be manifested until full healing is accomplished and is not necessarily demons being manifested. Diseased attitudes cannot be cast out, they are still part of the human personality. of the self, and are dealt with by healing through God's word. Thus, the emphasis in any case is to be on God, on His word, on the practicing of the Presence of God in our human spirit. See Romans 8:1-16 describing the battle between our human spirit and the desires of the flesh. As our human spirit stands united with the Holy Spirit the desires of our mortal body are dead, and we live, presently. in the rule and reign of righteousness.

Barriers to Wholeness - Failure to Receive Forgiveness
God's View:

Eph. 2:4-5 ; 1 John 1:9 ; Heb. 10:22 -It is purely an act of God alone, by His grace, that we have been forgiven of all our sins. We do nothing to earn it, either by fasting or praying, we simply receive it by acknowledging our sinfulness. Realize that Christ died for and freely gives redemption by the forgiveness of our sins, we are made whole and washed clean in our conscience and kept that way by the water of the word.

Hope:
Rom. 8:12 ; 10:4 ; Lu. 21:36 ; Rev. 12:11 -Some do not receive forgiveness because they are still trying to be 'good enough' on their own merit, striving to be perfect under the law. Instead we are to be in listening obedience to Christ and His word, trusting in His righteousness, the practice of His Presence rather than practice the presence of the 'old man'. It is by the blood of the Lamb and by our testimony to all that Jesus did on the cross and in His Resurrection, that our sins are forgiven, and by His resurrection we live in righteousness. We are to act forgiven by what Jesus did, receiving this truth is our responsibility, God will not do this for us.

Ps. 19:12-13 ; 139:23-24 ; Rom. 7:15-20 ; Eph. 4:22-24 -Allow God to search your heart, kneel as sinners before Him, acknowledge and assume that you may have been trying to deal with sin by your efforts, condemning yourself for failing and judging yourself as not 'good enough', or believing that your sin was too gross for God to forgive. Let God deal with these subjective (feelings) focus and change your focus to the objective fact that only Christ can deal with your sin, and that your responsibility is to accept that your are a sinner, and that it is Christ's blood that makes you a saint when you confess and repent. By an act of faith, receive forgiveness by Christ and from that point on act forgiven. Guilt, shame and conviction is to bring us to the point of confession and repentance which brings forth a covering of righteousness. We are to walk in this spirit, the spirit of Righteousness, Christ Himself.

Change:

Gen. 6:5 ; Matt. 12:33-35 ; Jere. 17:9 -We are not only to deal with specific acts of sin but with its roots. The structure of sin in the human personality originated when we turned from the truth in God to embrace a lie about Him. As we respond to life from our darkened heart and mind, sinful thoughts and deeds flowed forth as water from a polluted fountain. Our heart becomes a reservoir of unconscious disordered motivations and responses . We deal with this by no longer living by our feelings but by our will and our will based on the word of God which, in time, will change the root of our being.

Eph. 4:17-18 ; Hosea 4:6-7 ; Rom. 1:18-23 ; Eph. 4:22-32 -Ignorance will destroy you and your family. Indifference will harden your heart until you feel that you cannot forgive yourself anymore and give up entirely. Biblical change is a process. Realize you cannot handle or deal with sin but realize you are completely dependent on the Lord Jesus Christ. Confess and repent daily, see Jesus take your sin into and upon Himself , setting you free. Act forgiven, honor Christ by thinking and doing and being what the word says to think, to speak, and to act, daily growing into the image of Christ.