From Hell to Glory
1 Sep 2001
To give a very brief background, I was deeply involved in the occult and witchcraft for many years.... Though I first met Jesus as a child... it is the story of how I came to find Him again and His very great love and mercy towards me... Oh you would not believe such love!!!!!!!!!
Those that I have given free copies to, have really been mightily
blessed... I am not publishing... but giving it away free... to those He had me write it for. Here are a couple of chapters... basically my testimony...
From Hell to Glory
One day in March of 1999, I was sitting listening to a service on the
TV. The words of appeal to backsliders to return to the Lord were
getting to me. I didn't want to hear them. I didn't want to start all that
up again! I couldn't help but listen though. Then, would you believe,
they played George Beverly Shea singing Coming Home, Coming
Home, Lord I'm Coming Home . Once again the tears rolled down my
face. I had a date with a cyber partner on the net in ten minutes and I
used this to fight off the effect this song was having on me. Just as
George Beverly Shea was singing I've wandered far away from God,
now I'm coming home I got up to turn the computer on, letting out a
rather strong expletive as I did so!
The song stuck and ran around in my head for days. I couldn't get rid
of it. Then I got an email from a Christian email list and it touched me
in the same way. I wrote to the author of the message and told her
email had touched me, but it was too late for me. She wrote back a
letter so full of God s love for me I could hardly believe it! I had never
had a letter like that before. It also angered the anti-christ spirit
within me. So I wrote back a letter designed to shock, full of swearing. Yet part of it was a real plea from me for help. She ignored the shock
tactics and foul language and responded to my plea with more of
God's love and mercy!
Now this was too much. This woman was getting to me! So I sat
down at my computer and really decided to put her off. There was
going to be no plea in this one, just a page full of the foulest language
I could think of. The trouble was, my hands wouldn't type it. I COULD
NOT TYPE IT! Something or someone stronger and more powerful
than me wouldn't let me. I just couldn't do it. I just could not! My
fingers wouldn't type the words.
Once again the tears started flowing and I knelt down by the sofa and
cried. That was it. I cried and cried and cried! It was as if I had opened
a dam. The tears just would not stop.
Gradually, I started saying the word Jesus in between my crying.
Eventually I was able to add, Forgive me. Please, Jesus, forgive me .
I don t know how long I stayed like that, but we talked for ages. I
poured all my heartache and all my longing out right there at His feet.
And He listened! He did. He listened to the whole sorry tale and He
forgave me. Bless His Holy Name. He forgave me! As His wonderful,
longed for presence filled the room, Glory filled my heart!
He did more than just forgive me that day. The spirit of anti-christ was
defeated in me and removed once and for all! He gave me back the
relationship that Satan had stolen! He restored the relationship with
Himself! He flooded me with joy as His great love and mercy washed
over me. Oh my wonderful Jesus! There was no way I was ever going
to let Him go again!
Two down, one to go!
As the days went by, I revelled in my newfound fellowship with Jesus.
I told Him this had to be for real this time. I threw away all the
doctrine I had learned. I held on to Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, and the concept of a Father God and threw the rest out the window! I prayed daily that the Holy Spirit Himself would be my teacher. Not man, but Jesus. I felt strange with no beliefs and no doctrine to hold on to, so I held on to Jesus. It was pretty scary at first, but I wanted truth. Nothing less than the whole truth from God's Word would do.
I feel very privileged to have no church or fellowship in those early
weeks and months, for I am sure my behavior would have been
severely condemned. I changed nothing. I told God I wanted Him to do
the work on the inside before I even attempted to alter anything on the
outside. Someone said to me at this time, You can t. He can. Let Him!
So I did. I knew if God did the work, it would last. If I tried to change
me, it would only last as long as I coped with the strain of keeping it
God has His own wonderful priority for our lives. He knows the lessons we need to learn and the order in which we need to learn them. One major lesson we all need to learn is that when God has His hand on a life, you'd better take your hand off!
The first lesson He taught me was simply this&He loved me. I was
accepted in the Beloved, warts and all. Oh, how I needed to learn that.
I needed to learn to trust Him again. At that point I was saying, Though
You slay me again I will love You . I was not at all certain that He
wouldn't do precisely that! He gave me these verses at that time:
Jeremiah 31:3 The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea,
I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with loving
kindness have I drawn thee.
Jeremiah 31:4 Again I will build thee, and thou shalt be built,
That last bit was music to my heart. He, the almighty God of heaven,
was promising to build me again and just to confirm it beyond any
doubt He said, AND THOU SHALT be built! Well, I was more than
willing to let Him do it His way!
How He showed me and proved His love for me in so many different
ways during that period of my life. He loved me. I mattered to Him. I
was the apple of His eye, even if I was still cybering from 8pm to 8am
most nights! He taught me not to feel or accept guilt. He accepted me
and was at work in me. I needed to learn this. I needed to replace my
god with a big stick idea with the truth!
Now the church would never have accepted this, and it may well
offend all that you have been taught. I am sorry, but this is how it was!
I learned during this period that I didn't need to earn His favor by my
behavior. Indeed, I couldn't! As a result of all this, I came to love Him
with a passion that I didn't know I could possess. You see, I loved Him
because He first loved me! I learned to feel safe and secure in that
love, to start to value myself as He valued me. This was a whole new
experience to me. I really mattered to someone and not just anyone,
to Jesus and to His father, the God of heaven above.
There came a day, about eight months after I first found Him again
when there was a message on my computer that would normally
have aroused me sexually. But this time it made me feel sick and
disgusted. I was the property of Jesus Christ. I wasn't my own. I had
been bought with His precious blood. How dare anyone talk to me like
that! Well, they dared because I let them!
But I would allow them to do it no more. I went to my precious Lord in
deep repentance and shame, with the tears pouring down my face.
He was so gentle with me! He was so kind and so full of mercy, not
condemnation. He explained to me that I was His bride and He was
my Bridegroom and I must keep myself pure for Him. I was worth
much more to Him than the value I had been putting on myself. He
told me I didn't need to be humiliated any more and I didn't need to
punish myself. He had been humiliated enough for both of us! He had
also taken all the punishment a holy God required so I could go free!
I accept that freedom, Lord, I prayed, I claim it now. This demon fought! I started to pray in tongues. I got what I think was some sort of
interpretation. I saw something of the power of God and I knew that all
His power was at my disposal. It was as if the Holy Spirit was nudging
my faith, showing me the power of my God! As the thing came out of
my mouth, I felt as if my very insides were being clawed and torn. I
went on praying. My tongues changed and the thing was dragged out
of me screaming!
When the Holy Spirit released me, I deleted my contact list in my chat
program. I didn't use chat for many weeks and, when any came back
to me, I told them I was a Christian now and if they wanted to talk
about Jesus alright, but I wasn't willing to talk about anything else with
them. I ended up blocking many and some asked questions, but most
left me alone from then on.
I was free, completely free at last! All the praise and all the glory goes
to my precious Lord, Who I praise, and glorify and magnify and exalt!
Exodus 15:11 Who is like unto thee, O LORD, among the gods? Who
is like thee, glorious in holiness, fearful in praises, doing wonders?
Isaiah 61:1 The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the
LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he
hath sent me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim liberty to the
captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;
Jeremiah 32:27 Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh: is there
any thing too hard for me?
Well, is there?
If anyone would like the full version of all that led up to these last two
My only aim is that those God had me write the book for will get the chance to read it... free!!
God bless you, In his all powerful love